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You can’t control what anybody else does, you can only control your actions and reactions to things.” He also suggests that women should “go in with the confidence that they’re going to love you and they’re more likely to love you.

The more you worry about how often he’s logging on, and who else he’s dating, and why he hasn’t taken his profile down, the more likely you are to come across as needy.” Now whilst I can appreciate to an extent why he has drawn this conclusion – after all, if you had your opportunity to have your cake and eat it, you would – it really does fail to address the core issue with being with a man who still has an active online dating profile and is continuing to fill his boots and shop around.

If there is one thing that the 21st century and the internet has brought about, it’s options.

Before we had the world at our fingertips and we were separated by thousands of miles, we truly had no idea what was out there, and whether we were getting a good deal.

_______________________________ Read more Relationship Advice and Dating Advice: Why does he have a secret Facebook page? He won’t bring me out with his friends Friends with benefits: why me? This is an example of a guy getting caught with his hand in the cookie jar and then denying it ever happened. Because now you’re second guessing yourself, and wondering if maybe you’re the problem. We assume something must have tipped you off, causing you to be suspicious of your boyfriend.

Hi Guys, My boyfriend has just walked out on me after three years of what I thought was a great relationship. Yes, you did breach the trust of your relationship by snooping, but we can assure you that you’re not the one who caused irreparable damage to the relationship. Because otherwise we can’t see how you could “accidentally” discover he was on a dating site.

So what if you have met a guy and discovered that he’s still ‘shopping around’ online?

Book your private conversation with THE GUYS by choosing the Ask a Private Question option on our site.

now wouldn't that be a hoot :-) But this time, you'll be all the more wiser. Do yourself a favor and move on, and next time don't get so invested before you know who the person is you are dealing with.

Life's too short to hang on to something that makes you worry and wonder. and I bet a day didn't go buy that they were "wondering" how the other felt.... that in itself answers are questions of "can I trust him... you might get back on POF and it'll match ya up again.. The relationship is over, it barely started to be honest, and now you only know enough to drive you nuts and make it easy for him to make you feel crazy.

Now, no insurance company, bank, or retailer can lie and tell you that they’re giving you the best price, because you can shop around and do price comparison to ensure that you get the very best deal, and it seems that this has stretched its way to dating. Yes there are honest people who date online and there are success stories, but online dating is the home of many people that have an allergic reaction to being truthful.

Plus the very act of online dating seems to send a message to people that the grass is always greener on the other side, and to spread yourself out there as much as possible.

Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.hi, i met a guy on pof, been seeing him for just over three months.i deleted my pof account a little while into our relationship, he did say he wasn't going on pof on anymore.i was helping a friend to upload pictures onto pof and searched my guys name..he popped,i set up a bogus account to see if he would reply,he did saying he would love to chat.i couldnt hide my upset and told him what i had done, he said if it upsets me he will stop going online and that he was just chatting to friends he had made while fishing.i have logged into my account several times since and have seen that he has logged on...i dont know what to do? So the only thing I can think to say for this 1000000th thread stating "I don't trust my (insert label here), I set out to prove it, and I think I have, showing I can't really be trusted either" is to move on to the next person. This speaks of trust issues that were around before you met the guy.

I posted earlier today about what to do about my suspicions. How can I get him to accept responsibility for my security, gratification, and peace of mind."I don't know.

For our guys to show us that they are still searching the singles scene... If you are going to go for entrapment, make sure you get far enough to know if he's really cheating or just talking to people, or for that matter, just talking to women...for the whole thing or don't play the sneaky game at all.

Maybe if he gets on for the forum he can put in his profile he is seeing someone and is only there for the forums or for friends. You didn't trust him, looked him up but after going to all that trouble, you didn't carry out your spying far enough.

While I still believe what I wrote there, I’m finding that many of the women who are contacting me are not at the point where they are sure if the man is their “boyfriend” or not.

With that in mind I wanted to review one of the recent emails I’ve received from a reader and offer some additional advice for this problem.

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