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Advice on dating american lebanese men
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For the past 9 months or so I have been dating a dear man from Libya who is here for school on a scholarship. I wasn’t thinking we have to negotiate about it” before getting married. After six months of arguing, her husband finally relented, giving her an unpaid job at his textile company. Then the time comes that you start to feel that it’s too much.” His “Arab mentality,” according to Ina, meant that he suddenly “decided for you everything. I was toying with the idea of writing a silly post on the different types of girls out there to date, kind of like "The Sandmonkey's guide to women of the region", only it wouldn't just be the region, it would involve different religious and political backgrounds, and a lot of generalizations and feeble attempts of humor. I had a problem writing the entry on Lebanese girls, because the only lebanese girls I've dated were Maronites, so I asked my lebanese Sunni friend Fatma if there are any distinguishing features or traits to Shia or Druze girls. I am a secret to almost everyone he knows, and when he took me out to lunch at his favorite café he asked me not to hug him when I arrived, just shake hands. I understand why, I really do, but personally as a woman of 41 years old that still wants to have children, am I kidding myself to think that he might eventually come around or that it could even work at all? So, there ya go: I can tell you, if this may help, that maronite men with beards (who smoke and/or play a musical instrument, and are french-educated, most often at college protestant or lycee), are by far, the best kissers of Lebanon. They like to discuss Palestine, the French Revolution, law, and obscure poetry. He is so liberal in so many ways but I’m very uncomfortable being a secret when we have professed such deep love for each other…and he’s not just saying it, it’s true for him. But he doesn’t know what will happen with his country and situation, so I understand that too. I am beginning to realize that this love may be an impossible hope for me…and maybe there are aspects of his faith that limit him too much to even consider a longer term, more serious relationship, no matter how liberal he seems. |
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